Friday The 13th

Rating: R

Movie Release Date: February 13, 2009

DVD Release Date: June 16, 2009

Plot 411: Jason Voorhees is back and killing fornicating young people. What more do you need to know?

Review: This is a remake and revitalization of the original Friday The 13th. A group of young people go out camping and Jason starts his killing. In a twist, Jason kidnaps a girl named Whitney (Amanda Righetti) because of her likeness to his mother. A month after Whitney goes missing, her brother Clay (Jared Padalecki) scours the area looking for her. He meets up with another bunch of young people and, of course, they all try to escape Jason and his machete. I'm not a major horror fan or a Friday The 13th expert by any means, however, there were numerous changes in this version that may or may not upset true fans. For one thing, Jason is swift of foot, which I really enjoy. If you're going to have a large, undead dude coming after you, make it exciting and allow him to run and jump like a regular person. The stalking around in the dark is just monotonous. Another thing about this version of Jason is that he's shown to be intelligent. He's got traps and underground tunnels that reveal he's not just muscle but has a brain. Also, for most of the movie he's wearing a bag over his head but eventually finds his trademark hockey mask. These changes really give Jason a new M.O. and viewers are able to look at this revamped Jason from a different perspective. What remained the same as is all the nudity and sex and how Jason apparently dislikes the immorality of it all. Who can blame him, right? Those counselors were supposed to be watching him, not each other. Best of all, Jason is still all about the killing.

Watch It: For a new telling of an old classic.

Skip It: If you're a horror purist.

Weekend At Bernie's

Rating: PG-13

Movie Release Date: July 5, 1989

DVD Release Date: January 12, 1999

Plot 411: Two friends who are invited to their boss' house in the Hamptons discover that he's dead and spend the weekend trying to keep others from knowing.

Review: Andrew McCarthy and Jonathan Silverman play Larry and Richard, two lower-level employees at an insurance company. When they discover a claims error, they think a promotion is in their sights. However, their boss Bernie (Terry Kiser) has other ideas and puts out a hit on them. In a twist, the mob sets out to kill Bernie instead, and Larry and Richard discover him when they go to his house in the Hamptons. I wanted to re-watch this comedy to see if it still held up over time, because I remember thinking this movie was all shits and giggles as a kid. While it still had many humorous moments, this time through wasn't as good as I remembered. The first two-thirds of the film were so slow and drawn out. The laughs and action didn't kick in till the third act. I don't know if people would stick around for it these days. No one has any patience anymore. McCarthy is really funny in this movie and actually brings it to life during dull moments. Some of his expressions are priceless. Silverman plays the more level headed of the two friends, and at times comes across as completely naive. This contradicts his workaholic tendencies and his drive to get ahead though, so he doesn't really make sense as a character. The premise of the film (dragging a dead body around pretending it's alive) is pretty distasteful if you think about it, but some of the scenes where the body is actually being pulled about are the funniest. I wonder what that says about me?

Watch It: For the most active dead guy you'll ever come across - he plays Monopoly, water skis, rides a golf cart and has relations with women.

Skip It: Because it's really hard to suspend your disbelief for that long. There's too many unbelievable situations that the guys get into with Bernie.

Beaches

Rating: PG-13

Movie Release Date: December 21, 1988

DVD Release Date: August 13, 2002

Plot 411: Two girls from entirely different backgrounds meet one summer at the beach in Atlantic City and become lifelong friends.

Review: As children, aspiring performer CC (Mayim Bialik) and little rich girl Hillary (Marcie Leeds) meet on the boardwalk. Despite their difference they instantly become friends and keep in touch with each other throughout the years through letters. As adults, they meet again (Bette Midler as CC and Barbara Hershey as Hillary) when Hillary moves to New York on impulse. They become roommates and really get to know one another. However, a love triangle begins when the women are both attracted to a director with whom CC is working. This, and other life events, cause the women's relationship to be strained. They have an on-again-off-again friendship until a major life event causes them to pull together once again and support one another. This movie has it all and is so perfectly heartwrenching that it'll make the toughest guy shed some tears. The musical score is great as well, but it is really the performances of the leads that make this movie work. The friendship between CC and Hillary is so strong that it is almost a living thing, and like every relationship it has its moments of strength and weakness. Like the theme song, "that's the glory of love."

Watch It: With a box of tissues handy and the expectation that tears will fall.

Skip It: If you've got somewhere to be and don't want people staring at your puffy, red eyes.